Dante's Inferno - Farewell Jerry Falwell

Farewell Jerry Falwell

Posted in Unspecified

After spreading his message of hatred for several decades, Jerry Falwell, Babtist preacher, racist, homophobe, misogynist and all round nice guy, died today, far too peacefully.

Falwell, who over the years said such lovely things as "AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals", "I had a student ask me, 'Could the savior you believe in save Osama bin Laden?' Of course, we know the blood of Jesus Christ can save him, and then he must be executed" and "Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions", formed the Moral Majority in 1979, which brought the Christian conservatives together as a political force, and as such is largely to blame for the current stranglehold religious right has over American politics.

Other than spouting religion based hatred at anyone in shouting distance, Falwell could also be found where ever religious fanatics were trying to ban books and bring creationism back in to schools, where he would locate the closest camera so he could say things like "I hope I live to see the day when, as in the early days of our country, we won't have any public schools. The churches will have taken them over again and Christians will be running them. What a happy day that will be".

Jerry Falwell is survived by his wife Macel and their three children, as well as his close friend in hate Pat Robertson, who we all hope would join Falwell soon.

Our sources say that mr Falwell is currently in limbo, as neither side is willing to let him in.
"No fucking way," said Lucifer.
"Over my dead non-corporeal omnipotent being," said God.

Description

Dashboard

Recent Entries

Categories

Friends

Farewell Jerry Falwell

11:28 - 2007-May-15

Last Page | Next Page